November 20, 2003 I went for my annual GYN check-up. When it comes to routine health care, I am a total "do-goody". I go every six months to the dentist, I have my annual mammogram and a PAP and GYN exam every year.

Early December 2003, I got a call from my doctor's office - the results of my PAP came back abnormal, I needed to schedule a procedure called a colposcopy, where they view your cervix with under magnification. If they see any suspicious areas they take a biopsy sample as well as repeat the PAP test. I was assured this was a "big nothing", they were just doing a follow up as a precaution, and it was highly unlikely that there was any problem. There was no sense of urgency; I scheduled the procedure for January 2, 2004, after the holidays.

The day I went for the colposcopy, my doctor assured me in the same way the nurse had on the phone, this is probably just a big nothing. Most likely the PAP would be fine and they'd check me again in 6 months. As he performed the colposcopy I watched along on a monitor as he discovered some suspicious spots and some excess tissue. Taking samples for biopsy, still saying how this was mosy likely a big nothing.

January 19, 2004, my follow up visit. The biopsy was showing some highly suspicious cells, a more extensive biopsy was needed. I was scheduled to have a cone biopsy done - and for the first time, the possibility of cancer is being mentioned. Ironically, the PAP comes back with a clean report.

January 29, 2004, I have a cone biopsy of my cervix (LEEP), and an attempt to view the inside of my uterus fails. As I am coming around in the recovery room, I am being told that all the tissue they sample was problematic and the test results will be back within a week. My big nothing is starting to look like it could be something.

February 4, 2006, I am playing phone tag with my doctor - trying to find out the results of the latest biopsy. I am in a meeting at work and my cell phone rings - it is my doctor. I excuse myself to the hallway to take the call. In an instant I am hearing the life altering words - you have invasive cancer, not sure if it is cervical or endometrial. I start writing things down - I have to, because I am having what can best be described as an out of body experience - surely all this information is meant for the imaginary person standing next to me, because I can't have cancer. But I look down at the notepad and I see the words oncologist and chest x-ray and CT scan, and I realized I am writing down my new "to-do" list.

True to my nature, I immediately start a plan of action, a support network, and I start chronicling my experience. Through the links to the left I am sharing the emails I wrote to friends, excerpts from the journal I kept during this experience, updates on my adevntures with cancer and links I hope you never have to use, but will find helpful if you do.

And why teal? Teal and white are the ribbon colors for cervical cancer.